Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Post Olympics and Those Always in Ears.....Top Fives

Another Vista Way Morning

I have two Top Fives for you happy people today, and I guess you unhappy people can read them as well if you so desire. The first delves into what the Olympics would be like if it were composed solely of Walt Disney World events. The second gives you ideas of when you can wear your ears when you aren't in the parks. Enjoy!

Top Five Disney World Olympic Events

5 Waterfall Roulette – I know that I have mentioned this in a previous post, but it bears repeating for the Olympics. For those of you who are unaware of what roulette is, it’s a gambling game in which you choose a spot or color on a wheel. The wheel is then spun a ball is dropped in. If the ball lands on the spot you selected you win. But what if the game is reversed? What if instead of winning on the selected spot, you won by choosing where it lands wrong? That’s what Kali River Rapids does. You and eleven other guests enter a circular watercraft. Come waterfall time, 2-4 guests are going to be met with a wall of water. You had better have chosen correctly.

4 End of the Night Triathlon – After a full day of rides, food, and fun in the Magic Kingdom, all you want to do is go home. And guess what, so do the other ten thousand guests in the park. Welcome to the End of the Night Triathlon. It is you and your friends against the hoards of guests with only one goal, be the first in line to the monorails or ferries or risk waiting up to an hour and a half to get back to the TTC……easier said than done. But once you pass this first hurdle and you think your home free, guess again. Now you must make your way to the trams, not as long of a line, but everybody thinks they can fit ONE more person on… out lady with the stroller that doesn’t fold up for whatever reason. Finally you are at your car and home free, HA you wish. Now it’s time to get out of the parking lot and well, I’ll leave that fun portion of the event up to you imagination.

3 The Rope Drop 100 Yard Dash – The park just opened and you start to your favorite ride, but just as you are about to enter your favorite line you are met with an obstacle, fifty guests and one scared cast member with a rope in their hands. That cast member knows they are the only thing standing in the way of you and your favorite ride…..that and the fifty guests who ALSO want to be the first one in line. I hope you stretched up because once the countdown is done, it’s every man/woman for themselves

2 The Please Fill in All Available Space Gymnastics – You know this one. You have been waiting in line for anywhere from 1-2 hours to see the popular show or ride the popular ride but space is limited in the preshow room. From here you will be split into one of two sub events, “the suck up” or “the one more inch.” The suck up occurs if you are one of the first people in the room. Suddenly you and forty of your new best friends are standing elbow to elbow so tightly I believe its technically illegal in some countries (not really but it sure feels that way), and then you hear it. Like the voice of Satan calling to you from the PA system, “Please fill in all available space so we can fit in a few more people”.....and the only thing going to through your mind is THIS (It’s a link, click on it already. Jeez.). Then there’s the one more inch and if you don’t know what it is then you haven’t been paying attention. You are the person who feels like, for that instant, the Tetris God who sees such a way that the guests can move so that you and your five friends can squeeze in to THAT showing rather than waiting for the next one….prepare to be dispised.

1 Guest Swimming – This is an event we all participate in. Let me paint the picture: You have just gone through the turnstiles and you are walking underneath the train station when you notice a bunch of guests in front of you. Then you get the full picture, it’s parade time and every guest is on Main Street. You don’t have time to wait for it to finish because all you want to do is ride Splash Mountain. It’s guest swimming time. So you limber up, take a deep breath, and dive right in. A million “Sorry, my bad” and arm swipes with squeezing between people later and you look up… are only at the Confectionary. Happy Swimming!

Top Five Places to Wear Mickey Ears Outside of Disney World

5 Class – First of all (for those who, like me had to wear uniforms through middle and high school) nothing celebrates your new found freedom like black ears. Plus, who knows, your teacher could be a big Disney fan and there could be some extra credit coming your way

4 The Bar- Nothing says party like Mickey ears

3 A Funeral – Nothing says party like Mickey ears…..wait, umm anyways…..

2 Job Interview – Nothing tells employers that you deserve that position in accounting like a pair of black Mickey ears. Plus, it goes great with your suit. Don’t own a suit? Buy a suit, suits are cool. (SUIT UP)

1 Presidential Campaign Trail – Heck, I’d vote for you.

Have a Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah-Day!!!!!


  1. LMAO I love your Top Five Places to Wear Mickey Ears! Your posts always crack me up! Great job (:

  2. Thanks! No bad place to wear your ears I guess.

  3. Why doesn't this have a like button? :P

  4. A comment is just as good as a 'like' button in book, I appreciate it.

  5. I am laughing my Mickey ears off at your Disney World Olympic Events!!! Absolutely hilarious - thank you! :)

  6. lol'ed at the link. glad you're blogging again!!

  7. You never fail to put a smile on my face, John. :)

  8. Well gosh golly yall.....hahahah thanks though